aural identification

it’s been noted previously that i have a strange affectation when it comes to people and their sneezes. it most often comes up at work because there seems to be a significant number of particles in the air. i hear at least 30 sneezes a day. seriously.

i only use my regular retort with close coworkers, so as not to confuse those who aren’t familiar with my ways… this leads to me having to endure several sneezes after which i have to stop myself from blurting out “MASTERBLASTER!”

i’ve one co-worker, who sits fairly close by, that covers at least half of the sneezes for which i cannot answer. i’ve got the sound memorized, and i imagine it looks a lot like the following:



another co-worker sounds like he’s trying really hard to cover up… as i’ve memorized the first sneeze, he, too, cannot be wished good health, or even acknowledged:



and there is yet a third, who tries with all of his might to hold that sneeze in.



but, eventually, his body wins and he has to let it out; through his nose.



this leads me to the conclusion that, if given the chance, i could identify several people in my life solely based on their sneeze. and if needed, i could be a witness in an audible police line up.