last sunday morning, i awoke to an all-too-familiar feeling of a urinary tract infection. anyone who’s ever had one of these knows exactly the agonizing and acute pain they cause. the constant feeling of needing to urinate, producing barely anything, and the slow burning sensation that follows such a pitiful attempt at relieving oneself.
i drove to urgent care and waited in the lobby with all the other sniffling, sad looking people. after painfully peeing in a cup, i finally got to see a physician’s assistant… she told me i had a bladder infection.
so i got my ‘scrip for anything other than penicillin, as i’m allergic, and since i could barely stand to walk, i got some of those pills that make your pee stain the toilet.
after a week of diligently ingesting my nitrofurantoin, i woke up in the middle of the night *burning* up. i couldn’t sleep, my body was radiating such heat that i was sweating and shivering and my skin hurt. i was convinced that i had the flu… i barely called in sick to work and fell back to sleep.
a couple hours later, when the sun was up and i could see, i looked down at my legs and realized that i was having an allergic reaction to the antibiotics.
i had hives. all over. and all of my tattoos were swollen.
i spent the rest of the day either asleep or miserable.
it’s been noted previously that i have a strange affectation when it comes to people and their sneezes. it most often comes up at work because there seems to be a significant number of particles in the air. i hear at least 30 sneezes a day. seriously.
i only use my regular retort with close coworkers, so as not to confuse those who aren’t familiar with my ways… this leads to me having to endure several sneezes after which i have to stop myself from blurting out “MASTERBLASTER!”
i’ve one co-worker, who sits fairly close by, that covers at least half of the sneezes for which i cannot answer. i’ve got the sound memorized, and i imagine it looks a lot like the following:
another co-worker sounds like he’s trying really hard to cover up… as i’ve memorized the first sneeze, he, too, cannot be wished good health, or even acknowledged:
and there is yet a third, who tries with all of his might to hold that sneeze in.
but, eventually, his body wins and he has to let it out; through his nose.
this leads me to the conclusion that, if given the chance, i could identify several people in my life solely based on their sneeze. and if needed, i could be a witness in an audible police line up.
there are few things more annoying to me than having to use a public restroom… especially when it’s compounded by the fact that you *know* the people since it’s you probably also sometimes have to use the restroom at work.
here’s a tip for everyone… there are several visual indicators that a stall is occupied; especially when it’s the *only* stall occupied. a quick glance does a pretty good job of helping you pick your 2-minute throne. or rather, which one *not* to choose.
in case you missed it, or are otherwise unable to see, i’ll help:
there is no reason, earthly or otherwise, for you to choose the stall directly adjacent to the only other person in the whole, sterile, brightly-lit, echoey room.
at work, there’s a couple of water fountains by the bathrooms. they’re good for grabbing a sip on the way to a meeting.
but they’re too shallow for filling a nalgene more than 8 ounces because you can’t get the angle right.
additionally, if someone flushes, the water pressure decreases to the point of almost nothing and then comes back a second later, so you stand there getting your hand wet and none of the water gets in the nalgene.
it’s highly frustrating.
we recently purchased an inversion table in an attempt to remedy back troubles. i’ve had a pinched nerve since october of last year, and recent stressors haven’t helped any.
you basically get on, clamp your ankles in the holder and lay down. if you put your hands above your head, the table falls back further and pressure is released from the spine. this is supposed to be done twice a day and at the same time each day, preferably.
so, you lay, suspended by your feet, for five to seven minutes and then pull yourself back up when you’re done. but, not too fast! the instructions clearly state that if you get dizzy upon standing, you’re doing it wrong.