terrible customer experience

so, i had one final package to mail off to the judge after my divorce hearing. it’s required to be in his hands within 30 days, so i promptly made copies in triplicate, prepared the packets of said copies, and headed over to the post office on my lunch break.

of course, everyone and their mom had something to mail today. but, i was relieved to see that the world of automation has been extended into the realm of postal options. i interacted with a very polite little touch-screen, and received first-class postage for my 1lb 7oz package (incidentally, it set me back $2.07).



i proceeded to the left where the huge metal box was positioned to receive the package; not unlike a book repository.



i slipped my envelope in its anthropomorphous mouth and slid the drawer up with a satisfactory thump. unfortunately, i was presented with an alarming message!



immediately, my brain tried to recall how many ounces made up a pound and in the second that i realized my package had to be more than 13 ounces, i figured some haz-mat post office guy would discard this very important package and i’d get perjured or held in contempt or have a warrant issued.



luckily, my paranoia got the best of me and i called when i got back to the office and was assured that if the machine issued postage, my package was safe.